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3DS Features

How To Deal Without Having Internet As A Gamer When Moving

You just moved in and you are waiting for your internet service provider to finally get it back online? Yep that means no Netflix, no Facebook, no Hearthstone and no fun!

First step, Avoid the issue altogether

I want to come clean at first. I just moved out of an apartment that had internet provided. So, I had to subscribe to a new plan with a company (that I won’t name, it doesn’t really matter). I called a week before to have the guy at my door on the next Monday to have it all ready and connected. Normally, it works that way.

If you have one thing to remember, it’s this: call them BEFORE you move. Especially if you are moving on July 1st, it is super hard if you live in Quebec (to my international readers : Here, we all move on July 1st, or most of us do. So all the companies are overbooked).

The only problem is that my appointment was cancelled, so I had to wait an extra four days before the technician came to connect me. An error on their part but I’m not mad, they gave me a discount for the trouble anyway.

Also, my guild in World of Warcraft hates me. No internet is not a good excuse to miss a raid week.

BACK ON TOPIC!unabletoconnecttointernet

 

So you don’t have internet at all. What do you do?

Ps : I’ll assume that like me your cell phone plan don’t have an extra 100 gigabit.

You got older games you didn’t finish that don’t require internet access?

Older consoles are cool for that, NO DRM!!! If you got an SNES still connected to an old TV in the basement, go for it! Re-live your childhood memories, or remember why you never finished Ninja Gaiden.

The problem with newer games

Yeah I know that you could ALSO play newer games on your PS4 or Xbox One as easily as Mario Paint or Megaman 2. I know that. But if you are like me, you haven’t installed the day one patch of Bloodbourne (it’s still in the wrapper), you are doomed. Seeing ”YOU DIED” would actually be a relief for once.

space cadet

The original no internet game

Forget your friends, they will abandon you

Yep, no internet. No Online. And nowadays most shooters don’t have a single player campaign. Or just a bare bone one. Or it’s boring cause you are too LEET. *360 no scope, Doritos and Mountain Dew intensifies*

What about mobiles games?

Hahahahahahahahahahahaha! *Breathes* hahahahahahahahahahaha. Oh you were serious? Those aren’t real games, get real kid!

They are called games just because ”mobile application” sounds less cool for your candy crush loving mom.

Those are bathroom games.

What about REAL mobiles games? Gameboy and such

Oh yeah sure! But tough luck for me, I finished most of my Gameboy titles. I thought about buying Pokémon Blue on the virtual console. But you know… no Wi-Fi…

I had to go ahead and abuse my friend’s Wi-Fi to get Jirachi. I know it’s there for the whole month, but I had to get it NOW!

Jirachi-1

—–

Thinking about it I was really lucky. All my consoles were unpacked, plugged in and ready to go. If you are moving maybe you won’t have that luck…Let me see if I can come up with something for you.

Portable games, my savior

OK, so assuming that everything went wrong and some boxes are still at your old house, still in the truck or worst, underneath other boxes. Those stupid book boxes.

Make sure to keep your portable games WITH YOU AT ALL TIME when moving. You won’t have to look for it when you are ready to take a break. Bonus : it will give you points for the little game on the 3DS that you never opened. Life saved!Raccoon_Mario_carrying_a_Green_Shell

Phones and tablets, the lesser evil

I know I just said that those games are not that entertaining. They could save you from boredom for two or three hours if you download a couple before actually losing internet. And make sure that they have an offline mode to play with.

Steam forever

Thinking about it, you could also go back in your steam’s backlog and actually download some games beforehand. If your backlog is big and you think it’s a problem, make sure to read my text on it, wink wink.

—–

That should keep you occupied for three or four days like it did for me. Planning is everything. Make sure to be well prepared and always have a backup plan.

Before my appointment was cancelled with my service provider I had used 2.1 GB of internet on my phone playing Miitomo (the game is actually fun! add me on twitter @HyperBL) and Hearthstone all day.

Don’t be like me. Use Wi-Fi. Think with your head, not with your thumbs.

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Stand-up comedian, writer, youtuber and most of all : Gamer. Gaming is love, gaming is life.

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